End in Sight

“People usually fail when they are on the verge of success. So give as much care to the end as to the beginning.” – Lao-Tzu

I have noticed this tendency in myself and have determined to “push through” when I feel most disheartened, because it is “always darkest before the dawn” and we want to give up most, right when we are on the cusp of success. People in marathons may think they can’t keep going, but the ones that do, finish the race.

What does it mean to start with the “end in sight”?

The end is the ultimate goal, the prize, the target, the desired outcome. Vision is seeing into the future or seeing beyond the current circumstances or seeing what could be rather than what is. So, if we start any endeavor with the “end in sight”, we know what we want and we see ourselves attaining it.

My mother always said, “Can’t is a coward, too lazy to try.” It’s probably from some German wisdom handed down from her grandparents, just like a lot more of those old sayings. What is the value of these sayings? They stand you in good stead when you need a little extra oomph, a little kick in the behind, a little more wind in your sails, just enough determination and perseverance to finish what you start.

Quitting is not an option. Another thing my mother preached is “You can do anything you set your mind to, if you want to bad enough.” Well, who can argue with that?

Another piece of wisdom from one older than I, “You have what you want. If you wanted something different, you would have it.” Biblical wisdom, “You have not because you ask not”.

What does all this add up to? We chart our course. We choose what we focus our life’s energy on and what we proceed towards.  Who starts a journey without a destination? Who begins a task without the end in sight?

Which one of us could not predict the end result of certain behaviors?

It’s easy to see in others, but hard to determine in ourselves. That’s what true friends do. They share their insights with each other and help keep each other on track: keep us focused, keep us centered, keep us moving towards the things we say we want. We should not stand by as our friends get blind sided or derailed by things we see coming down the path they have chosen.

King Solomon understood friends and valued friendship in his writings.

“A friend loves at all times.” Proverbs 17:17

“There is a friend that sticks closer than a brother.” Proverbs 18:24

A true friend is someone who knows the song of your soul and sings it back to you when you have forgotten the words. ~ Anonymous

What end do you have in your sights?

Case in point: Recently, a good friend of mine who loves to take on “project boats” heard about this “hot deal” of a jet boat that was for sale. The boat was owned by a friend’s sister, who was afraid of it because it went too fast and had not used it recently even though she had paid for a brand new motor in the last few years. She only wanted $1500 for boat and trailer. Well, he was frothing and I thought WOW, that sounds great. So we went to see it together. I was along to keep him company. The pictures were from better days.

When we arrived, the boat looked like it had been sitting out in the weather for years. Three times, after he wrote the check, I found myself blurting- “Just go get your check back and let’s go.” Once, when he had to physically dislodge the tongue of the trailer from two inches of mud. Next, when there was no way to check the engine. Finally , when the jack stand was not operational and he was hand jacking it and using brute force with a history of back problems to get the trailer hitch connected. I told him, “If she wanted to sell this boat, she would have had everything ready.” That doesn’t describe the incomplete boat trailer title issues and general vagueness of when she got the engine rebuilt or when it was last on the water. I think it was a mixture of ego and stubborness mixed with greed that had us hauling a questionable trailer for 3 hours back across heavy traffic and long bridges. I tried to be supportive, but everything I saw and knew predicted a bad end in sight.

Two days later, he told me, “You were right.” He cleaned it all up and bought new tail lights and new jack stands before he realized something. The motor was not recently rebuilt or replaced. It was in 2005. His suspicions aroused, he found other evidence that the boat had been submerged and knew that if he fired the engine it would probably blow up. Jet boat that was going to “make him money” when he got it cleaned up and running was not nearly as desirable when he saw all the issues. He could see the “end in sight” then, but much later than when I saw it. He stopped payment on his check and returned the boat with several hunderd invested in the experience.

So, do yourself and your friends a favor. Be honest with yourself first, then be honest with your friends and invite them to do the same for you. I would NEVER have traveled with him to get a “project boat” to turn a profit, knowing he already had 4 boats sitting in the wings wanting his attention.

If you are determined to proceed down a path, be clear sighted and clear headed on what is the most likely end result. If you know what it is, we will all root for you to have it, no matter whether its what we would choose or not. The main point is look hard, see the likely outcome and make an educated decision.

Don’t turn back, once you’ve counted the cost and chosen your path. Success is right around the corner and attainable– if you just keep going!!! He could have restored that boat and invested in it and enjoyed it, if his end was to have a jet boat for his very own. His end vision was to turn a profit, so when profit started disappearing, he lost his zeal. My end vision was his health and back issues being exacerbated by the physical task. No amount of money is worth sacrificing your health.

Another truism from Ruby- “If you have your health, you have everything”. Is your good health the end in sight? Is making money? Is having fun? What are you willing to place your life’s energies in having? That’s the prize- choose wisely and choose well, then press on- until the end is in sight.

Find your true colors and live accordingly. I am “true blue”. What are you?